Lessons Learned from an 18-Month-Old

I know. Technically, Lucy's not actually 18 months yet, but really, throwing an (almost) in there would just clutter up the title.

Life with a toddler has been full of big and small surprises, so I thought it time for another "lessons learned" post. :)

• Multigrain Cheerios. They sound healthy. They box looks healthy. I'm sure they ARE healthy. But you know what? They are STICKY, too! What is not immediately obvious on the box is that they are slightly sweetened. And when your child likes to attempt to cram 42 cheerios in her mouth at once, along with her whole hand, the child and everything surrounding said child gets sticky, too. And when you buy cheerios at Costco, they last FOR-EV-ER.
• When shopping at Sam's Produce, and you go by the stack of blueberry butter cookies, make sure your toddler is well away from the cookies, or you will find yourself $4 the poorer because the toddler has used her amazing extend-o arms to magically cause the cookies to be on the floor out of their packaging. She will then use these same powers to nab a tiny habañero pepper while you glance away for 0.3 seconds.
• Velcro shoes are quick and convenient... for toddlers to remove from their own feet. Shoes that tie are a good foil, but make sure to double-knot, because untying shoes is almost as much fun as un-velro-ing them.
• Once your child becomes mobile, so does every portable object in your house... including barstools, shoes, cell phones, deoderant, dirty clothes, cups....

 

 

• Toddlers can learn to throw a tantrum (including hitting their head on the floor!) all on their own without seeing it modeled. Where do they get this stuff?
• Even if you have consistently left your child in the church nursery every week since they were 6 weeks old, they will still manage at some point to pick up a habit of screaming when you leave them, and you (the mom) will feel very guilty about walking away, not from your child, but from the poor nursery workers who have to deal with her. 
• Toddlers time their dirty diapers to be exactly 37 minutes into naptime. 
• Do not try to predict when nap time will be one month from now. If you do, your child will inevitably change their schedule.
• Learning how to discipline includes much more of a learning curve than one might imagine. Add the dynamic of figuring out how to discipline around other people, and things get complicated.
• If it has a button, your toddler will want to push it. 
• The output of cuteness from your toddler increases in a direct correlation to how close bed time is. Until they hit the wall of tired. Then it gets ugly.
• The more you let your child carry their own food around the house, the more often you really ought to vacuum. (haha... right). 
• It is difficult to find just the right balance between capturing moments without actually encouraging the behavior you're photographing. 

 

• Toddlers are fascinated with closing doors. And with deadbolts. Be forewarned if you find yourself on the outside of said door. 
• Thunderstorms are less fun when you have a sleeping baby in the house.
• If you take your child shopping at Kohl's, and you bring strawberry yogurt as a snack, and you've pushed your child just a little past the "I'd like to be done now" point, you may find yourself (a supposedly fully grown adult) frantically licking yogurt off your child's shirt in full view of God, the crockpots and the lingerie.